How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Randomize