there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
