I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
