i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Randomize
