What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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