I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize