After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
