I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
accomplished twins. life is a go
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Randomize
