last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
