her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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