sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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