what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
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