I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Randomize
