I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
