I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize
