if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
