Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
