ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
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