I CAN MOONWALK!
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
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