i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
