you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Randomize
