all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
