that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I am never drinking with the goths again.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
