Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
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