the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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