is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Randomize
