We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
