So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
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