omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
