problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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