This is not my ceiling
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
