I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
