you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
he thought i was a dude.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Even my vagina gasped.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize
