Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Randomize
