We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
