Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
my god I love twenty year old dicks
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
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