After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
