I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
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