A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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