do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
