My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
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