You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
