Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
