jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize