I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
