where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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