Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Randomize
