so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
