$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
