just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
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